nutella sex= disaster
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
