If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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