There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole