Texts From Last Night

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  (207): View more from Maine

  I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.

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  (207): I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy. http://tfl.nu/9ve4
  Replies (19) Good night (592) Bad night (3733)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick

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  (973): I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick http://tfl.nu/xw1l
  Replies (41) Good night (1181) Bad night (3766)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.

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  (206): I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers. http://tfl.nu/k6c6
  Replies (26) Good night (6178) Bad night (599)
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled

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  (251): I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled http://tfl.nu/uuon
  Replies (144) Good night (1155) Bad night (6566)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys

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  (615): You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys http://tfl.nu/1mtc
  Replies (2) Good night (2410) Bad night (915)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.

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  (443): she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help. http://tfl.nu/37hn
  Replies (3) Good night (2248) Bad night (1048)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend

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  (720): Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend http://tfl.nu/9h3j
  Replies (5) Good night (3376) Bad night (892)
• Favorite

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.

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  (270): Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil. http://tfl.nu/p6d2
  Replies (14) Good night (2209) Bad night (602)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.

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  (206): You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want. http://tfl.nu/h1r5
  Replies (5) Good night (570) Bad night (1355)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.

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  (843): God I feel like the rain man of hangovers. http://tfl.nu/3opn
  Replies (3) Good night (835) Bad night (510)
• Favorite

  (347): View more from New York

  I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?

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  (347): I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay? http://tfl.nu/bmfn
  Replies (14) Good night (442) Bad night (1359)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.

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  (609): Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced. http://tfl.nu/7v0e
  Replies (8) Good night (448) Bad night (1082)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?

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  (616): My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right? http://tfl.nu/u00i
  Replies (5) Good night (404) Bad night (931)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?

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  (+44): Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin? http://tfl.nu/rh13
  Replies (5) Good night (437) Bad night (245)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"

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  (817): I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here" http://tfl.nu/ku7n
  Replies (2) Good night (353) Bad night (336)

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