Texts From Last Night

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  (716): View more from New York

  I can text with my tongue

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  (716): I can text with my tongue http://tfl.nu/gbw1
  Replies (23) Good night (3212) Bad night (615)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me

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  (203): trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me http://tfl.nu/u42j
  Replies (20) Good night (2359) Bad night (3808)
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  (228): View more from Mississippi

  they just did a mariachi cover of free bird

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  (228): they just did a mariachi cover of free bird http://tfl.nu/opnr
  Replies (21) Good night (5377) Bad night (1007)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?

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  (847): Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden? http://tfl.nu/x4ab
  Replies (111) Good night (12350) Bad night (1435)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across

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  (918): Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across http://tfl.nu/uhsj
  Replies (11) Good night (3575) Bad night (972)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...

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  (416): Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card... http://tfl.nu/vpen
  Replies (9) Good night (4178) Bad night (841)
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  (361): View more from Texas

  When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard

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  (361): When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard http://tfl.nu/jjpz
  Replies (7) Good night (827) Bad night (2633)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.

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  (678): I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you. http://tfl.nu/ocnt
  Replies (1) Good night (1957) Bad night (765)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.

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  (813): Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b. http://tfl.nu/ahce
  Replies (17) Good night (4083) Bad night (1706)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.

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  (908): I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well. http://tfl.nu/i8n0
  Replies (4) Good night (1924) Bad night (797)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out

  (417): View more from Missouri

  You'd think the first few times would have been enough

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  (616): If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out (417): You'd think the first few times would have been enough http://tfl.nu/z7d7
  Replies (10) Good night (543) Bad night (1394)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.

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  (859): You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary. http://tfl.nu/khbo
  Replies (5) Good night (932) Bad night (272)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.

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  (916): We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out. http://tfl.nu/zjk4
  Replies (5) Good night (1107) Bad night (277)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.

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  (678): You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest. http://tfl.nu/fvym
  Replies (3) Good night (496) Bad night (220)
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me

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  (828): This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me http://tfl.nu/34nr
  Replies (3) Good night (346) Bad night (241)

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