Texts From Last Night

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  (650): View more from California

  sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.

  (415): View more from California

  we had.

  (650): View more from California

  well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.

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  (650): sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter. (415): we had. (650): well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again. http://tfl.nu/lm7j
  Replies (5) Good night (721) Bad night (1498)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.

  (785): View more from Kansas

  again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.

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  (303): okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it. (785): again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now. http://tfl.nu/6i8m
  Replies (36) Good night (1720) Bad night (7158)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had

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  (717): They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had http://tfl.nu/qmkc
  Replies (46) Good night (4972) Bad night (1853)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.

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  (404): Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge. http://tfl.nu/3ppt
  Replies (5) Good night (4754) Bad night (865)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on

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  (903): I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on http://tfl.nu/lvsd
  Replies (7) Good night (2903) Bad night (874)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.

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  (304): He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately. http://tfl.nu/s0gm
  Replies (25) Good night (1024) Bad night (4558)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.

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  (214): I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good. http://tfl.nu/2il8
  Replies (12) Good night (2737) Bad night (1139)
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  (909): View more from California

  He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.

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  (909): He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere. http://tfl.nu/wyhi
  Replies (4) Good night (3180) Bad night (822)
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  (510): View more from California

  Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.

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  (510): Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it. http://tfl.nu/z26i
  Replies (4) Good night (2418) Bad night (815)
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.

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  (618): His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark. http://tfl.nu/bjsg
  Replies (9) Good night (1318) Bad night (1489)
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  (254): View more from Texas

  Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.

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  (254): Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor. http://tfl.nu/w3ms
  Replies (8) Good night (1811) Bad night (604)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?

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  (919): What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room? http://tfl.nu/ulxd
  Replies (4) Good night (1341) Bad night (543)
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  (870): View more from Arkansas

  Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.

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  (870): Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic. http://tfl.nu/y3t4
  Replies (9) Good night (1390) Bad night (708)
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  (239): View more from Florida

  Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course

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  (239): Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course http://tfl.nu/4x8m
  Replies (2) Good night (752) Bad night (406)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?

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  (303): He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery? http://tfl.nu/y325
  Replies (10) Good night (467) Bad night (848)

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