your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
