Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
