You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
