Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Randomize
