Plan B is the new Plan A
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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