Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
