You're my little dorito
You're completely useless in the revolution.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
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