Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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