Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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