I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
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