So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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