You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
