You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
