I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
