News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize