5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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