google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
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