1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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