At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
