Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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