after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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