put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
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Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
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I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
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