When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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