i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize
