I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Randomize
