Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
