so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
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She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
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