I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
