just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
