Will you blow on my dice?
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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