i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
i will never coherently bang her
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Sext me about skeletons
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
