omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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