dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
