i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize