someone get that fucking seahorse.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
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