i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
