u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
