Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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