Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I believe in your delicious
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
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