I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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