yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
