New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize