This is not my ceiling
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Randomize
