Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
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