nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Damn victory sex feels great
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
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