you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
