All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Randomize
