I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize