and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
